The Keeper of the Keys, Ch. 4

How do you introduce muggle students and their families to Hogwarts and the wizarding world?

How about a letter delivered by a nocturnal flying animal in the middle of the day? And if the family believes the letter, and follows the instructions, they are met by a professor to go to Diagon Alley. Unless you are Harry Potter, the Boy Who Lived. In which case, you get Rubeus Hagrid, Keeper of the Keys and Grounds. A half human, half giant man who was expelled from Hogwarts before he could graduate and had his wand broken (although it lives on in his pink umbrella). Great job, Dumbledor, well thought out. 

I mean, yes, there is no one other than Molly Weasley who has as much faith and loyalty to the headmaster, but not really the strongest move you could make on towards a smooth transition. With a family that you haven’t checked in on since dropping Harry at the doorstep, but you know they hate wizards, so why not aggravate them? The first thing Hagrid says directly to any of the Dursleys is “Budge up, yeh great lump” telling Dudley to move over on the couch, then “Ah, shut up, Dursley, yeh great prune” to Vernon after being told “I demand you leave at once, sir! You are breaking and entering!” by Harry’s Uncle. It’s a humorous, but not very polite interaction. 

And surprise: “Harry – yer a wizard”. And your parents didn’t die in a car crash, but were murdered by Voldemort and you are famous in this world that you know nothing about because you survived. Happy Birthday! 

And before you know it, the best interaction with the Dursleys happens – Vernon insults Dumbledor and Hagrid retaliates by giving Dudley a pig’s tail. 

And thus begins the adventure towards Hogwarts. The Diagon Alley shopping trip is to commence in the morning, and the breadcrumbs that Albus Dumbledor is dropping for the Boy Who Lived via the Keeper of the Keys and Grounds (But not secrets, because we all know Hagrid can’t keep a secret no matter how hard he tries) are starting to form the outline of a path. 

Diagon Alley

Most roads go north/south or east/west, unless you’re Willy Wonka or the London wizarding community. In which case, you can go diagonally. Sorry, bad joke. 

It is now time for Harry to learn the secret password. Oh, wait, I’m jumping ahead just a bit. First they need to go through the Leaky Cauldron – the gateway to the secret entrance to Diagon Alley – where of course Hagrid and Harry manage to run into Professor Quirinus Quirrell and his stutter. Next they meet mythical creatures (goblins) and go to Gringotts Bank to pick up Nicholas Flamel’s sorcerer’s ston- I mean, pick up some funds to buy Harry his school supplies. After the “you-know-what” in vault 713 and learning that the wizarding world uses the strangest numbers for their currency (29 knuts to a sickle, 17 sickels to a galleon – although what that translates to in muggle currency no one knows), it’s shopping time. 

Madame Malkin’s Robes for All Occasions is where Harry and the readers are introduced to the infamous Draco Malfoy. The proud Slytherin and pure-blood son of Lucius and Narcissa (née Black) Malfoy and Harry’s greatest rival at school. While Draco and Harry never exchange names, Draco’s attitude is the first indication Harry has that he doesn’t want to be in Slytherin. Then Hagrid puts down Slytherin house and informs Harry that the man who killed his parents was from Slytherin and that “there’s not a single witch or wizard who went bad who wasn’t in Slytherin.” While we know that statement is patently false (see Peter Pettigrew from Gryffindor house, James Potter’s best friend who betrayed the Potter family to Voldemeort, as a prime example), Harry does not. At this point, there’s probably nothing anyone could do or say to convince Harry that he would want to be in Slytherin. 

Harry and Hagrid run through most of their errands, leaving only the wand and Harry’s birthday gift from Hagrid: an owl. The beautiful snowy owl that is Harry’s familiar and the first true birthday gift he ever received. Per Wikipedia, Hedwig is a female germanic name that is a combination of “battle, combat” and “fight, duel” (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hedwig_(name)). In my opinion, Hedwig lives up to her name and is a fierce defender of her chosen human. And thus, only the wand remains to be bought.

Ollivander’s: Makers of Fine Wands since 328 B.C., the “only place fer wands” is where Harry ultimately gets his 13.5 inch yew wand with a phoenix feather core – a wand whose brother belongs to Voldemort. Garrick Ollivander remembers every wand he ever sold and is an important resource later in the series, and it is he who imparts the wisdom of “the wand chooses the wizard”. At this point the shopping trip is pretty much over and Harry and Hagrid wind their way back to the Dursley house. Hagrid gives Harry his “golden ticket” (we never see what it looks like, but I always imagined the ticket from Willy Wonka, personally) to get on the Hogwarts train at Kings Cross Station come September.