ALCOHOL IS ALWAYS AT THE TOP OF THE RODRIGUEZ FAMILY PARTY SUPPLIES LIST

ALCOHOL IS ALWAYS AT THE TOP OF THE RODRIGUEZ FAMILY PARTY SUPPLIES LIST & I remember that birthday party when my aunt grabbed my arm with her cold ass hands & asked me to get her a glass of water so that she could sober up & when I brought it for her she lost her balance & fell onto me I felt that cold Brita water on my left shoulder but then I felt a surprising warmness on my left leg & that’s when I noticed my aunt passed out & had peed on me but I couldn’t even get mad at her because her husband was out with his other family that night celebrating his eldest’s birthday & my cousins birthday was the week before & he never showed up so I helped my aunt sit down on the brown leather couch & I left to my room to grab my towel before heading to the bathroom I teared up a little because I couldn’t think of any appropriate way for her to deal with her husband having another child with a woman every time she birthed one for him & drinking helped her & I think I think it would help me too.

__________________

This poem is based on a true story that occurred in my family which made it difficult to write about. Family gatherings can be tricky, but that it when the truth often comes out especially when alcohol is involved. Growing up, alcohol was at the top of the party supplies list in my family because we could never party if our alcohol was not ready at the table with a bucket of ice and glass cups. I have recently taken a liking to Khadijah Queen’s book, “I’m So Fine”. I noticed that she writes prose poems where she does not use punctuation marks and uses “&” instead of actually writing “and”. This seemed like an intriguing style to try out.

The moment I describe in this poem is a moment that I have never managed to forget while growing up. I was probably about ten years told when it happened and I am just beginning to get some closure on the situation at the age of twenty… it isn’t even my situation, but I hope that can help you guys understand the deepness of it all. I think this was the best style to use for describing this moment because I feel like punctuation serves as breaks in poetry. Since there are none in this poem, it emphasizes how much overwhelming emotion, stress and darkness was carried through this night I’ve described. I am not venting about this situation or seeking closure so much for myself, but more for my aunt who stopped drinking about three years ago and refuses to acknowledge that any of this occurred at all.

This seems to be something that occurs in many families and I hope can serve as a message for some. What’s the message? You are not alone! I send lots of love through this message and hope you enjoy my poem. Take care of yourselves and I’ll see you all next week. xoxo

Yours Truly,

Isha S. Serrano

(The Wind’s Sentiments)

Thomas Benke: Looking Around In Bird by Bird, Anne Lamott, in the Chapter “Looking Around,” says this: Now, if you ask me, what’s going on is that we’re all up to here in it, and probably the most important thing is that we not yell at one another. Otherwise we’d all just be barking away like Pekingese: “Ah! Stuck in the shit! And it’s your fault, you did this …” Writing involves seeing people suffer and, as Robert Stone once put it, finding some meaning therein. But you can’t do that if you’re not respectful. If you look at people and just see sloppy clothes or rich clothes, you’re going to get them wrong. She goes on to speak about empathy for other people and also, as an extension empathy for yourself. So, in a sense as you try to write believable, relatable characters, you will come to forgive people their trespasses—because no one believes they are the villain of their story, so you have to write “bad,” or “evil” characters from a point of view where they rationalize what they are doing in such a way that it is the right or only way they see is possible. By extrapolation, then, if you begin to forgive and withhold judgment from your less-than-desirable, or annoying characters, perhaps you can extend the same courtesy to yourself and forgive your own trespasses and sins. This, for me, starts to enter the realm of “writing as therapy,” and though I am a firm believer in that—I practice it to this very day—I think I would caution anyone who thinks that simply writing through things is going to lead you to a place of light and love. I am not saying it can’t by any means. What I am saying is I have wrote through my thoughts and my problems and my desperation and depression for decades and I still had enough baggage on my shoulders to supply an army platoon with rations for a year. In any case, when thinking about craft, it is very important to step into the shoes of all of your characters, especially those characters that you see as antagonists and villians. I believe there are very few universal maxims in writing but one thing is virtually certain: every character you write is your version of that human being. Confucius said “everywhere I go, there I am,” and that is never more true than when you are writing. So if you are writing a character that is distasteful to you, it might be effective for you to ask yourself why that is the case. I wrote a blog for Obscura last semester titled, “The Puppy Had It Coming.” The gist of the article was to pose a puzzle to writers. How can you write a scene where an adult human kicks a puppy across the room and the reader at least understands why. I am not saying there is any way to justify the action or for the readers to be on the human’s side unless they are sociopaths. I am saying you need let the reader know how dark the place is in the character’s mind that he is capable of doing that.

ALCOHOL IS ALWAYS AT THE TOP OF THE RODRIGUEZ FAMILY PARTY SUPPLIES LIST

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